I am the Navi: Hub Hikari
by True-InTha-Blue
Summary: I am the NetNavi, Hub Hikari In which one blurs and separates the line of life and death, brothers and friends, love and life, death and murder. To which really flowed in his veins? Data or blood?


**Hey True-InTha-Blue here **

**With a short Battle Network fic.  
Depicting a more darker turn of how was made.  
Think about his origins for a second  
A dead infant soul put into a potential killing machine.**

* * *

I am the NetNavi, Hub Hikari

In which one blurs and separates the line of life and death, brothers and friends, love and life, death and murder.

To which really flowed in his veins?

Data or blood?

* * *

Lan was sleeping. He was not. He had no need for sleep though at times it felt nice. Was that because he was programed this way or was it because on some level he thought sleep was suppose to be part of his daily routine to spring forth the next day?

He wouldn't need sleep tomorrow either.  
So he sat. Confined to a space small for some, but it was enough for him and his throne. His eyes closed, but also why did he need eyelids? Either a luxury or a cosmetic, he didn't know.  
Nights like these, most nights like these allowed him to release the withering paradox inside of him, allowing another day to go with smiles and protective caring that he showed to others.

But now wasn't about others, it was time for himself.

He almost glared through the screen at Lan's peaceful face as he dreamt on peace and innocence. Lan grew up with innocents so of course he would be able to accesses it so easily.

Not him.

He only had innocence for a short while before it was torn away from the violent hands of death and his mind thrust back into the freezing body of binary and data. Into the word of efficiency and task. There was no time for his mind to grow up, to smile and learn before the information of the world and its harsh rules were thrust into his mind turned matrix.

It would drive anyone insane.

And he was no exception.

Dr. Hikari never told Lan exactly how he was created. Secretly he thanked his NetOp's denseness for accepting things at face glance.

Unlike the gift he was presented to Lan which was peaceful and gentle, his resurrection was the opposite.

His rebirth was violent.

Have you ever tried to pull a body out from a grave? Its hard and there is a lot of dirt, rock, splinters and flesh that are torn up during it and no one is happy to see it.  
Years ago from the darkness and nothingness came seeing light and searing pain. Pain from the first time feeling and having you soul being unnaturally controlled and inserted into a machine.

So much information, so much detail exposed to the undeveloped mind and soul, scarring instantly occurred.  
He remembered that all he could do at that time was lash out and scream in anger and pain at whoever caused this. He still had a copy of the newspaper article that talked about the massive blackout that caused half of Den City to shut down, plus the fact that half the paths on the Net broke to pieces.

They said it was because of an unknown terrorist attack.

Hmph... he knew better.

He was not dumb; everything what he was, his nature of his creation, was that of a monster.

He was a monster.

He was the modern era Frankenstein's monster.

And if he was the terrible creation than father was no less Dr. Frankenstein.

Despite of how violently he had emerged from the grave to the net, he had to give credit to the Dr. Hikari for being able to pin his still out of control body and mind and keep him from reaching havoc on the net and probably the rest of the world.

He glowered.

Still, there was a reason why Lan received him for his 5th birthday and not sooner. It was not a matter of the young boys age.

It was the rest of the family.

First there was him, who was hating of his existence. Having all his infant innocence torn away so quickly and ripped from death; he was rather vindictive of life and humans in general. Especially… father, if you could call someone who would do that to his own son that.

There was a reason he hardly addressed Yuichiro Hikari as father, or papa, or dad like Lan did. He despised the man.

Well, he did. Now it was just merely not giving a damn for the man, only faking it whenever Lan was worried.

He had always been a good actor. He just needed to fool the rest of the world that he wasn't.

At the beginning he had tried multiple times to destroy himself in order to go back to the embrace of death, to reverse what has been undone.

Dr. Hikari had spent a good portion of a year trying to sooth his disturbed spirit to... civil terms. And then another portion of the year trying to convince him that he needed to live this new life.

The doctor took very careful control over his body to make sure he wouldn't try to find a way to kill the man through hacking into the machines around him, or again trying to kill himself or disrupt the net once again during his birth.  
First it was hard... Dr. Hikari plays dirty. He brought up videos and pictures of his short life in his mothers arms and playing with Lan. His emotions had rippled and tore itself apart from looking at them. Sometimes, his shut himself down because the emotions were too great. The want to be loved again... he wanted that.

He remembered though, that he didn't want Dr. Hikari's love. No... that man's love involved breaking the laws of nature to bring back something that was dead because he couldn't let go.

But still... when Dr. Hikari brought up his trump card, a chance to protect his brother and possibly.. even assist his mother in the future.

Fulfillment.

Purpose.

Things that he wanted, and reasons why he shouldn't kill himself. However, he would only do it, if Dr. Hikari agreed to never use the Navi Project ever again. That he will destroy any data of this monstrous project and never have anyone suffer like he did.  
Dr. Hikari was very agreeable if you had managed to hack a buzz saw to come close to his neck.

The second problem of course was Dr. Hikari but the reasons have obviously been addressed.

The third and most tortuous, was... mama.

Imagine being a mother, distraught after your baby died, being told that he has been brought back to life as something you couldn't touch, hold; brought back as something not human.

She did not speak to Dr. Hikari for months.

As for him, she hated his very existence.

To her, he was a mockery of her dear son. He wasn't her baby boy, so innocent and full of giggles and joy. Instead a being that was not so innocent, a tool in the modern world who spoke when he shouldn't be able to, knew things he shouldn't be able to, who... shouldn't be alive.

It hurt, it hurt that she refused to acknowledge him as her son even though he had changed so much. Though he did not remember much of his time alive, he remembered her love and desperately craved that love once again. To have her hate him like that, ripped even more of what little innocence he had left.

Despite of what he was, he wanted to be her little boy again, despite of the fact she couldn't hold, hug or kiss him. But maybe a nice look or warm look. ANYTHING. But no, for two years he was rejected as a being by the very woman who birthed him.

During those years, he just spent most of his time in a state of despair. He hardly reacted to anything, only answering as simply as possible to Dr. Hikari's questions or better when he was fighting and deleting the simulations for his mind goes numb. The passing of time became a menial thing. For awhile, he just didn't want to feel.

But the surprise to see his Mama come to him in Scilab wanting to just... watch him. He stared at her and he couldn't tell of her expressions. Sadness welled up in him and he fell to his knees confessing what he had gone through, the desire to kill himself rose in him again as he attempted to take his life right then and there. Screw what he said to Dr. Hikari.

STOP!

Those were the first words she uttered to him that were not full of loathing. He did stop and looked at her in shock, feeling something strange in his eyes.

Tears.  
He could cry?

This shocked her more than anything else was that he could still feel. True emotions, not the simulated ones that she thought he initially had. Not... not ones of this much... sorrow.

And then no longer was she clouded by the bitterness of his death and resurrection and now see that he was indeed suffering from this fate but that he wanted to try, oh how he wanted to try to use this chance to love his mother again. That right now he was on the verge of insanity and only wanted someone to love him.

They cried together for hours desperate to hug one another through the barrier between their worlds prevented that. It took a while but in time and through many hardships, Haruka Hikari came to accept the NetNavi as her lost son, despite of the fact she'll probably never be able to hold him again.

And he was happier-  
though he still wished for death.

It tortured him to see his mama stare at him so sadly at times through a computer screen.  
Yes he was able to talk to her but...

All mothers have the right to comfort their children. Hakura couldn't. And it was hard for her to look at him at times, no longer was the little baby eyes so innocent and full of wonder but instead something entirely different.  
His eyes full of a forbidden knowledge that shouldn't be allowed for any mortal to see. And though his body looked like a ten year old, there was some things that shouldn't be there. For example, no ears but symbols sticking out the side of his head. He had another one fused to his chest holding what was a 'heart'. His skin was a suit and he had muscles that should not exist for a child that he was mimicking its age.

And so, he had come to accept that the reality was that he would never have the same bond with anyone in the human realm as he was a Navi and that he shouldn't be alive. He would never be a proper son to Mama, and he certainly never forgive Dr. Hikari.

And now it came to his biggest fear:  
Lan.

The thoughts that plagued him about his former twin reaction towards when receiving him. Would he be happy? Would he be disappointed? Would he figure out his biggest secret?

Even if they were on separate opinions on what he was, all of them, he, mama and Dr. Hikari agreed that Lan should not know about the truth. He of all people should at least retain the image of a healthy and innocent family.

He desperately wanted to protect Lan's innocence, for if he couldn't keep his than at least his brother could.

When Lan turned five, he unknowingly received his resurrected twin for his birthday as a NetNavi.

And he was full of joy on how Lan was happy to have him as his NetNavi. And so, he was given a purpose in his semi-false, semi-second life. He was to protect Lan, both from the dangers of this world and from the horrors that it contained. He was to be the older brother, Lan's guardian to nurture the boy to have fun and grow up as a good person. It was a simple purpose but fulfilling; something that would give his life meaning. And slowly he was able to regrow a heart that wanted to live. Lan was a person who showed him fun and allowed the boy's innocence wash over them both. Lan was his best friend and didn't care if he was data or not.

Nevertheless he dared not think about the future.  
When Lan would die.  
And he would be living a mortal life left without a purpose

And so, in came the net.

Being a Navi with real emotions and living in place where emotions not truly there was... a bit difficult. He had to adjust not to be too strong with his feelings and learn to be more logical than emotional. So he learned more about his NetNavi side, became accustomed to the world of numbers and code he onced despised. He was eventually able to make friends with other NetNavi's by his penchant for violence and fighting... but he had to be very careful around Lan. He did not want his brother to be exposed to the violence he was capable of.

But still, it was a lonely existence for a few days.

He had peace though.

Through Lan's best friend Mayl, he had met Roll. And she was a nice NetNavi. But she was still just a Navi. No true emotions. ignorant of the suffering he had endured. She was nice though, or as close as she could come to it being an artificial being. So he accepted her and allowed himself to have something of an real friend. Of course, Lan always remained his top priority.

And eventually he was able to be friends with Gutsman, Glyde and Iceman. Yeah, a bit daunting at times but he learned to live through it. Lan was ignorant of what he really was, Hakura eventually truly forgave Dr. Hikari and he didn't want to kill the man anymore and was able fool Lan that he didn't harbor hate. He had made the perfect persona known as MegaMan

But there was someone more observant than Lan; Roll

Though sometimes, not being as dense as Lan, she noticed his slip ups. And questioned them. Learning the ways of the net he used logic to dodge the question. It was a malfunction, he might had a bug, his systems were overheating, simple things like that.

He thought that was enough to quell her logical mind. But... there was something always there. But he would not know of that spark in Roll's mind until much later.

And then came WWW.

It was hard to hold back when the NetNavis that threatened to harm what was left of his family. He wanted to tear them all apart. But he reigned in his violence because of Lan. His brother should not have been exposed to these type of dangers, but it would be worse to hold him back and watch people Lan cared about died. It would torture the one person he was trying to protect.

As the situation got worse Dr. Hikari approached his former son talking about the situation. He had vowed to protect Lan no matter what the cost. And instantly the doctor knew he was talking about his life.  
So when Dr. Hikari gave Lan the Program of Hub .Bat , he said nothing as he could not get out his words to work at such a shock. What was that mad man thinking?!

But there was no time to speak when Lan ran out the door wanting to be a hero. He prayed to whatever being beyond the death he once was that he would protect Lan and prevent the worse from happening.

Of course, what right did he have to pray to beyond death when he was the one who escaped from it in the first place.

Luckily, Lan and he did survive and stopped Wily from unleashing the life virus. But...

Lan found out about the truth of his origins.  
That one program: Hub . Bat

Damn you Dr. Hikari.

However Lan's innocence protected himself, taking his brother's unnatural resurrection as something amazing and looked at it at face value. And for that he was grateful.  
But Lan wasn't the only one there at the time when that news was revealed.

Glyde, Roll, Gutsman and Protoman were there as well. And he remembered the strange looks they have him. They were completely wiped away though when the bigger threat was still on the loose.  
But still.

There was a reason why he didn't want Lan to address him by Hub anymore. Hub was dead... MegaMan was the only thing living that had any trace of him. There was a reason he didn't want Lan to call him Hub.

But this wasn't the end.  
He died a second time.  
He gladly gave his life to save Lan and return to the black embrace from which he returned from. He wanted to be a selfish for once, leave Lan for the world of the living for the rest of his life and finally go back to whence he came. But there was no rest, no rest whatsoever. His mind was still trapped in the world of numbers and data. Why did the Hikari line continue to curse him?  
Yuichiro Hikari had ruptured his soul to be put into a machine from sleep and Tadashi Hikari trapped his soul to still be in the machine.

He even tried to consult the program of Tadashi AI, to prevent his sanity from slipping away. But the very concept of him to the memory program was incomprehensible. The program was to respond to names, not to a NetNavi born with a human soul.  
So for a week he was trapped in darkness, with no body, no voice... nothing but his haunting thoughts.

Once again Dr. Hikari lied to Lan and Hakura about bring him back, it took a week to decode the data, it took the rest of the time trying to calm his deranged state back to normalcy.  
But the worst part, the worst part was realizing, that he was practically immortal. His mind would remain trapped within the confines in the data-world never being able to escape to that peaceful embrace.

His sanity had been truly broken by then.

When he was resurrected the second time, Yuichiro had heavy duty Navis ready to restrain Megaman to prevent another black-out.  
These 10 of these heavy duty Navi's would give Protoman a hard time.  
There were fifty of these, including some that were customized.

They were all deleted immediately once he came back, his anger unbound and his mind unhinged.  
He didn't feel a bit of remorse when he tried to attack Yuichiro again.

His mind had degraded to that of a psychopath. Lives, good and evil, they did not matter to him anymore.

This had changed him, back then and even to this present day, he knew inside his core that he could and probably would kill a human if they ever threatened the ones he cared about. Whether it was shooting them and firing their insides with his buster or tearing out their heart with his hands.  
Either way, he wouldn't feel the slightest shred of remorse.

But around a month he was able to calm down, not kill Yuichiro, regain his calm persona and reunite with Lan to continue to protect the boy.

But it became less protecting Lan from the world, and more of protecting Lan... from himself.

Evil of man, digitized in a chip, almost as much as a monstrosity as he was. The dark chip brought a persona out of him that was always there, that had become stronger after he died the second time.

One part of him was relieved that had become a separate entity, it made it much more easier to reign back his homicidal tendencies, his madness. Now he had something from Lan that didn't want to be hidden.

But something else happened during the time of Dou's Comet that... that made his life... surprisingly easier.

The act of Double Soul.

The scientist thought it was merely a super powerful way of a Navi give powers to Megaman when have a friendship.  
What they didn't realize that the Double Soul goes both ways.  
No the other navi's did not get his powers... but something much, much, more.

What he gave them was a blueprint:  
for a soul.

An actual human soul.

How did this impossible phenomenon occurs?

He had many theories but the one he most liked is that because of his loneliness, his symptoms adapted to be able to make others more like him.  
Illogical? Yes  
But that's what made him human.

Of course, it was merely a blueprint, not actually constructed.

It was the navis he had given them to, to develop them.

Those Navis he doubled soul'd with, would develop a soul either slower or faster than others.

Those who were closest to him developed them the fastest.

GutsMans, FireMan, MetalMan, NumberMan, heck even ProtoMan and SearchMan as they normally visited him.  
Even the others who lived far away eventually began to grow into something else.

There were signs. Subtle to the human operators but noticeable to the navi's themselves.

They were beginning to not always agree with their NetOps. Not in a rebellious ways but they were no longer anymore always agreeing with them willy nilly to whatever they wanted. Soon he noticed them looking up sights for human culture, listening to music more and... started to be... irrational outside of their programming.

The most prominent one... was Roll.

She developed her soul the fastest and adjusted to her emotions marvelously.

It was slow during the times after Nebula and the Cyber Beast incident but then again... Roll was the one who came to visit him. She started to understand his moments more, and reached out to something he hadn't felt in a long time. But he was afraid, so very afraid. So for a while, as she tried to get closer he kept trying to gently push her away. Afraid of this contact.

But the human emotions had made Roll persistent.

"Hub." A voice interrupted his thoughts.

Ah... speak of the deviless.

He watched her with avid attention. She was a beauty to his eyes, both appealing to both his Navi's and human taste. Due to his unique situation, he would not be as attracted to a more robotic navi and a human one. But like he said, there was attractions to both.

But once he and she got together, his regard for the rest of the female gender had all but disappeared.

"Another one of those nights isn't it?" He didn't answer instead leaning deeply to her touch as she slide her hand across his face.  
Physical touch.  
It was addicting to him.

"Yes." It was the first time he spoken in several hours. She said nothing, knowing what he was going through. After all he told her everything.

The puberty program activated and she blossomed into something else, something like him.  
And then his attraction to her as a Navi, had become into full blown want.

He desperately wanted to be with her because it was something like him. Something he could touch, and possibly be the closest thing he was.  
Of course, being half insane with extreme intensified emotions; a human being devoid of physical contact for his life had also something to do with it.

But he waited until they got more comfortable even after the confession before the endearing contact was made.

But one night, she caught him.  
Caught him broken.

Because sometimes he slipped, he slipped back to his despair and his want to die. But it was only during the night where he envied his NetOp and his human family in their wholeness. Not something torn in half like him.

She came, and she accepted him. Not know what he was but giving him the elusive emotion of love all the same for him.

Once again tears sprang in his eyes when he held into her breaking open everything. What he was, what he is. Before then she knew only his light, he showed her the darkness in him. The monstrosity he was.

That's when she first addressed him as 'Hub'. The dead human name. He didn't expect her to remember that.

But it meant more than that. She knew he was different. She knew that what he was wasn't as clean or simple as everyone thought it was. Yeah, she came to the conclusion logically but now she understood it emotionally.

What she was offering, through that word, that name, was far more than what he ever had.

He was happy with a NetOp, he was happy with his former Mama accepting him. He was happy with Dr. Hikari no longer trying to complete Navi Project.  
But... they were all separate from him. A dimension apart and a species apart. Even with the copybot there was

They were blood, he was data.

He was happy to have Navi's as friends. He was happy to be a program to aid others and protect others.

But they were all numbers and patterns. Contained, slow to evolve.

They were data, he had blood.

But circumstances advised, or maybe the being beyond had finally granted a blessing to him to help him endure is eternity of suffering by giving him someone who he could finally love and touch. To reign in the sanity of humanity he lost by giving someone who was learning to be human in the digital body who didn't suffer the inhumanity of being resurrected in it.

So they became close, closer than any level beyond human and nabi companionship. Combining the unfathomable depth of human love, the pure dedication and devotion of a Navi, and the animal lust that was contained in both.

As he felt her cradle him, in an embrace that was similar but completely different of the Embrace of Death.  
This was his Entwine of Life

Lan gave him purpose in the first place, but that would only last so long as the boy was alive. He would eventually die unlike his virtual brother who would live forever so long as the net existed.

It would be Roll to continue his reason to live. To be able to feel such comfort in life, to live and love with her as they continued to be the strange beings they were. Cursed and blessed with power, and eternal life.

He was MegaMan Hub Hikari resurrected into a digital being of mass power, with unlimited adaptability to his very being, making eventually be the most powerful and dangerous being in the world. He was a monster in nature, hero by fate, brother beyond dimensions, soul giver to a new race and a lover of someone who was like his very first breath of fresh air.

Hub Hikari is dead.

MegaMan lives on.

End

* * *

**I dunno if I want to make other chapters for this, from other characters perspectives but we'll see how my schedule manages.**

**Also sometime in the future I am going to start several shorts in one story about MegaMan and Roll growing up and becoming intimate.  
Stay tuned!**

**Sincerely  
True-InTha-Blue**


End file.
